Rest is a responsibility: plan an off-site for yourself

It also made me smile because for the last couple of years I have planned a grown-up version of this day, by myself. Both years have been absolute bliss. I have returned home feeling rested, but energetic and always with great and unexpected ideas for myself and The Tall Wall.

‍

There is a school of thought that says setting aside a day with no agenda and no plans is a wonderful thing – and I honestly could not agree more. However, for many, especially busy high achievers, this can feel incredibly difficult to do. An unplanned day of 'nothingness' can feel lazy and overly indulgent. So, this got me thinking, what would a modern-day version of the Just Seventeen 'Pamper your Bits' day would look like for a professional that wants to step off the treadmill in a way that takes them further physically and mentally than just a spa day or a round of golf?

‍

If you’re in this camp, read on because below I have suggested how to plan such a day and the sorts of ingredients you might put into it, both indulgent but also, productive in obvious – and not so obvious – ways.

Now a day like this starts well before the day itself. If you have caring responsibilities, some planning is going to be required to give you a day off. You know what you need to do and who you need to ask. I also like to plan to take myself away from home (there are just too many jobs and distractions otherwise). A big shout out to the Lord Poulett Arms in Hinton St. George that’s hosted my 'off-site' for two years running. A dream of a pub-hotel in a magical location.

As I said, it would be great to set the day aside and see what emerges, but this can feel too big a leap for many. So, here’s some ground rules and ingredients you might put into your day:

1. Start early, but not too early. This is a day to look after yourself, after all. Get up and spend the first hour leisurely making a drink/having breakfast, stretching and waking up. I am assuming you are away from home or caring responsibilities are being shouldered by someone else.
2. I’d love to say, don’t look at your phone for the entire day but for most people that just feels like too big a mountain to climb. After the initial hour of waking up, briefly check your phone for anything truly urgent. Do not switch your phone on first thing on waking. Do not get sucked into news or social media. That’s a downward spiral and you know it won’t make you feel good. Turn off all alerts and put the phone away. Plan to check it once more later in the day.
3. Get outside, ideally in the morning. This could be for a good long walk, a run, swim or a bike ride if that’s your thing. Feel the elements on your face, whatever the weather. During this time, just let your brain wonder wherever it wants to go and be present by noticing what is around you with all your senses. Just notice, don’t judge, don’t try to make sense of it, just let it be and see where your mind wants to take you.
4. Get a pen and paper – coloured felt tips if you’re feeling creative – and spend an hour taking stock of the important aspects of your life. Coaches call this the 'Wheel of Life' exercise and you can find out how to do it here.
5. If the 'Wheel of Life' has inspired you take it a step further, write a letter to your future self. The point of this exercise is to get a bigger picture perspective on your current situation and what is important to you in life. To do this, find time to write a letter to yourself, imagining you are nearing the end of your life. You are reaching back in time to yourself today to tell you how your life has panned out, what you have accomplished and what steps you have taken to reach these achievements. Imagine that you are looking back on the most successful and fulfilling life you could have wished for. Be as vivid and specific as possible. Start the letter with, "I am writing to you, [YOUR NAME], from [PLACE] and [DATE]".  Once you have completed this ask yourself how this process informs the present for you? What do you notice came to mind when you read the letter back?
6. Include good food. Not a ham sandwich AGAIN. Choose something nourishing and indulgent, not sugar/fat heavy.
7. Add in at least one physical luxury in the day. This could be a massage, a facial, a long hot bath with a good book at 1pm (can you imagine?!). Take your time, gently easing in and out of this element of your day. There is no need to rush.
8. If you want to reflect specifically on work, do some journaling on the past 12–18 months of your work. Ask:
   • What am I proudest of?
   • What outcomes have I influenced (beyond my job description)?
   • Where have I grown as a leader – and where have I plateaued?
   • What feedback has repeated itself?
   • When did I feel most effective?
   • What am I proud of?
   • What have I outgrown?
   • What do I want to do as a result of my reflections?
9. Plan something for the evening. Extroverts will want to see friends; introverts will want to wallow in the luxury of being alone. Watch a film at home (no phone!). Take yourself to the cinema or a meal out – either on your own or with friends.
10. Limit your alcohol and get to bed early – we all need more sleep.

You have read the above, you’ve nodded sagely and said to yourself, “Yes I really should do something like that”. Then you get back to your emails and file this in the "maybe in a few months; I am far too busy” category. Instead, look at your diary and block a day out now, sometime over the next 12 months to have this day to yourself.

‍

As someone much wiser than me once said, “rest is a responsibility” so diarise this as you would any other important event and protect it. It is, after all, just one day of your whole life.

If you would like to find out more about the work we do at The Tall Wall, get in touch at hello@thetallwall.com or find out more at www.thetallwall.com.